Falkor

Santa. Listen. They haven’t planted sunflowers in two years now. I like sunflowers. I like climbing. I need more flowers to eat. Can you pulleeeze pass this along to the powers that be?

OK now that that’s done, how are you doing? I’m doing great. I keep growing taller and taller and taller. It freaks people out when I go to the door and look in. I love it!

Santa, you know, goats are really fussy about cleanliness. We will not, positively not, drink out of a dirty water bowl. I’ve given these instructions quite clearly to all the volunteers, but sometimes they use (GASP) a dirty sponge to clean the water buckets and troughs.  I mean, seriously. Well, so I’m kind of a gadget guy and I think we could use this amazing thingamabob to scrub really, really well (to a goatly standard of satisfaction): https://tinyurl.com/scrubber-for-falkor

I’m also rather particular about my feet. These feet take me all over the farm and they get a lot of use, let me tell you. My hooves seem to grow about twice as fast as everyone else’s (must be my bionic genes and that’s why I keep getting taller, too). I need a new set of hoof trimmers to keep my tootsies in good shape:  https://tinyurl.com/trimmers-for-falkor

Santa. Cookies. Can we talk about cookies? See, different people here have different views about the value – and quality – of cookies. We’re not really supposed to get many cookies because, well, they’re very caloric for one thing and for another, we get used to being bribed. Yeah, well let me tell you, that ship has sailed. So here’s the deal: if someone wants to go in or out of the house and I’m standing at the door, they have to pay a cookie toll.  No joke. It works every time. These are the best cookies I know of (besides Scottish shortbread): https://tinyurl.com/mrspastures-cookies-for-falkor

I’m well aware that you will be aiding and abetting in perpetuating my bad behavior (and the resultant human compliance). That’s the idea. OK – I’ll share with Tony and Caroline. Does that make it better?

So Santa, people are sometimes act nervous around me. Did I mention how tall I am? And I have horns I’m not afraid to use if the occasion warrants. But I can be nice if you scratch my face in just the right spot. And I snuggle with the other goats at night and I’m impossibly handsome. Plus, every farm has to have “THAT” goat, if you know what I’m saying. Anyhow – would you please send me a sponsor? I’d really enjoy that a lot and I’ll behave when they come to visit.  Promise. https://shop.stargazingfarm.org/product/falkor/

Santa, don’t forget I’ll see you this coming Saturday at the farm. We’ve got to get some good photos together! Tell all the fraidy cats that I’ll be in the “Goat Containment Center” for the day so I can be viewed and admired but I won’t be able to headbutt anyone (oh, snap!).

See ya,

Falkor